Many times, the question, “How could you?” is asked prematurely in situations. It is a query of suspicion that has somewhat already placed the blame before the facts have been gathered. It is an assessment that has been made prior to carefully weighing all the evidence.

The Israelites had taken over Canaan’s land. Joshua had divvied up the territorial boundaries of the land each tribe was to possess. Those tribes that had been given an allotment by Moses on the east side of the Jordan (Reuben, Gad, and the half-tribe of Manasseh) were returning there to the wives, children, and cities they had temporarily left behind to fight for their brothers.

One the way back home, these 2½ tribes set up an altar by the Jordan. After hearing of this, the immediate response of the tribes west of the Jordan was to gather the assembly of Israel together at Shiloh to make war on Reuben, Gad, and the ½ tribe of Manasseh. The greater part of Israel was zealous for the Law of God and was not going to tolerate what they perceived to be a breach of the covenant, an act of infidelity.

To their credit, the Israelites sent ambassadors to talk with their (wayward) brothers before shooting the first arrow, slinging the first stone, or thrusting the first sword. These representatives leveled the charge: “The whole assembly of the Lord says: ‘How could you break faith with the God of Israel like this? How could you turn away from the Lord and build yourselves an altar in rebellion against him now?’” (Joshua 22:16).

To their credit, the Israelites also gave them an opportunity to come over and live among them where the true altar of God was set up at Shiloh. Their problem was, however, that they had assumed too much. They had made a rash judgment based on the way things appeared on the surface.

The 2½ tribes responded: “The Mighty One, God, the Lord! The Mighty One, God, the Lord! He knows! And let Israel know!” (Joshua 22:22). Then they proceeded to explain that they had not built the altar for sacrificial purposes as the rest of Israel had presumed. Israel had misjudged their motives. Rather, they had built the altar as a witness that they were also a part of Israel. They too had a right to bring their sacrifices to the sanctuary of the Lord. Israel rejoiced at their response.

This story is convicting when it comes to interpersonal relationships, especially inside the body of Christ. We discover the following principles:

• We should suspend judgment until we have gathered all the facts.
• We should go to those who are caught in or suspected of sin.
• We should not be accusatory in our approach to others (“How could you?”).
• We should offer those caught in sin a way of escape.
• We should rejoice when we find that they are right with God.
• We should take solace in the fact that whenever others misunderstand us, God knows our hearts.